Sunday, September 9, 2012

It is OK to say, “I’m not OK”



My story


It was the last weekend of November 2007.

I was not ok.

It was six months since I'd been a victim of a crime that would change me forever.

I was not ok.

It was five months since I'd moved back to Sydney from my life living overseas for several years and my old friends here were all doing different things and I didn’t want to burden them.

I was not ok.

It was five months since I had gotten out of hospital after being treated for depression, post traumatic stress disorder and poly-substance abuse.

I was not ok.

It was five months of living sober for the first time in my life and having to deal with the raw emotion, the flashbacks, the fear, the disgust, the desperation, the sadness, and the sense of responsibility that I'd been the key player in the destruction of my soul.

I was not ok.

It was Sunday the 25th of November 2007 and I was in such a deep dark hole that I thought I'd never ever get out of.

And when my family asked if I was ok, I lied.

I crawled into bed with a bottle of wine and music up loud. A stack of strong sleeping tablets all pushed out of their blister packs and spread over the doona.

I cried. And I cried. And I screamed...

I AM NOT OK!

But then I went to my family doctor. I spent some time in hospital. I spoke to people.

And I started to feel a little less not ok.

I got involved with outpatient programs at a very good psychiatric facility and I kept speaking to people.

And I started to feel a bit ok.

I continue to speak to my psychiatrist every week. I speak to my family every day. I hold my three year old son in my arms, and I know…

Nearly five years later, I am more than ok.

With the help of my amazing network of family, friends and healthcare professionals I have come through to the other side.

Who will you ask today?

RUOK?

And please don’t forget: It is OK to say, “I’m not OK”.



For help please use these helpful resources:
Call: 1800 RUOKDAY (1800 7865 329) to connect with crisis lines
Visit: your doctor, a counsellor or trusted healthcare professional
Access: ruokday.com for tips from their information partners

Lifeline 13 11 14
Suicide Call Back Service 1300 659 467





Please find below our R U OK?DAY Blogger Stories of Inspiration. The Australian blogosphere has united to inspire all Australians to take responsibilty for the people in their lives who may be struggling and need an opportunity to say 'I am not OK' to a friend or family member. May our words and experience give hope and call everyone to action to help stop little problems becoming big ones.












































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