DO NOT READ

3.34pm Friday 15 February 2013

Dear Reader

First off, you are awesome. Thanks for stopping by. But...

No need to read this post. Thanks again for clicking on my link and all but you can leave now. Raise my bounce rate, that's cool. I don't care about it anyway (oh yeah, Vanessa?). This is all just stream of consciousness stuff trying to break my writer's block. I'm sure it will be boring so don't bother hanging around. There are so many more interesting blogs you should be reading right now. Your time is precious, don't waste it here.

I don't know what has got into me but I'm stuck and it is driving me crazy. Since my post about dating last week I haven't been able to write a thing. Right now I'm sitting here, up in the Blue Mountains of Sydney, in a quiet room that has a window looking out onto the garden. My family is upstairs. My sister and brother in law are there with Noo while my mum is having a nap with my niece Mala. My dad is outside doing his outside jobs.

I'm free for a moment. Free to sit at my laptop and write.

I flick over to Evernote and scan my notebooks searching for an idea from the copious amounts of links I have saved and bullet points I have written, hoping for that spark that will ignite a word storm.

What is holding me back, I wonder? Usually I just sit here every couple of days and I write. I love writing but something has got in the way. Maybe a few things. I keep getting caught on words and my usually impeccable spelling skills are nowhere to be found.

I feel like my brain needs a wash. A psychic cleaning out. Something has muddied the waters of creativity in there. Something I heard or read somewhere? I don't know. Maybe someone said something to me that hurt my confidence. Usually when I am down this is the place I come to and the writing helps me process the shit I feel but I've been avoiding blogger.com for a week.

I haven't been to bed much before 1am every night for a while. I wake at around 7.30 most days and my usual daily routine has been fairly unchanged. When I'm not looking after either Noo or Mala I'm in front of the laptop. Actually that's not quite true this week. My mum has been in town with us so I've been spending some time with her.

When I think about it I have been avoiding my laptop. I actually watched three movies this week (Two Days in New York, Silver Lining Playbook and Pitch Perfect). I hardly ever watch TV these days. Noo has become the committed little night owl staying up until 9.30 most nights which makes watching adult shows (I don't mean porn!) pretty difficult. It can be hard to write when Noo is still up but not that hard that I can't get a post out so what has been going on?

5.31pm Saturday 16 February 2013

Are you still reading?

Seriously, Alt-Tab over to somewhere else. I'm still babbling about nothing.

We are still up in the Mountains. Had a brief trip over to Katoomba today to...

Noo, the Valley, me and Mala - Blue Mountains, Sydney

12.24 am Sunday 17 February 2013

We've just had the funniest night up here. The neighbours came over for dinner and seriously we all laughed so hard we cried.

My sister, BIL, niece and Noo are all tucked up in their beds asleep. Mum and dad are beavering away upstairs doing the last of the cleaning up. Yo and I cleared the table through out the evening but they like to finish it all up in their own special way.

My parents are extraordinary hosts. With my mum in her 70s and my dad in his 60s they make an amazing team of home entertainers. Everything is done with the precision of seasoned caterers and event planners. Well, my mum ran her own catering company for 15 years so it isn't any wonder!

Recently they hosted 20 neighbours and friends at an Australia Day lunch here in their home. Three courses, with I don't know how many dishes per course, and they did the lot themselves. Some guests brought desserts and helped out a bit while they were here but basically mum and dad did the lot.

Seriously they are an amazing team. If you ever get invited to dinner, accept without delay. And bring good wine.

Right, I'm off to bed. We're driving back down the Mountain to civilisation tomorrow. I think someone is doing a pancake brunch in the morning before we go. I gotta get some sleep...

8.57am Sunday 17 February 2013

I've had two pieces of toast for breakfast, one honey, one jam and a cup of black coffee and five chocolates from mine and Noo's "Secret Stash" we have up here. I feel gross.

A friend of mine, who's kids' birthday party we went to a few weeks ago, tagged me in some professional photos she had taken at the soiree. I thought I was looking pretty good that day but going by the pictures on Facebook I look HUGE!

How do you feel about friends tagging you in ugly photos? Do you untag yourself to remove the offending photos off your profile? Or leave them there so you don't appear to be rude and overly self conscious?

Maybe it is just the wake up call I needed to stop fucking around stuffing my face with sugar and get serious about my first goal for 2013 which was to get on top of my health by losing 7kg.



Are you still here? You poor thing, listening to me prattle on.

Well, at least I got some words down. Hopefully this might get me out of my malaise.

If you have made it this far I hope you didn't fall asleep and bang your head on the keyboard!

I'll be back with better content soon. I hope.


V.