It's been a while...

So much has happened since April that I don't even know where to begin!

Last time I wrote I'd just started a new relationship after three years of singledom. Everything was lovely and went really well until about three or four months in I realised he wasn't the one. He was so lovely but I wasn't in love with him. I've been single again about three months and I am really enjoying it. I guess the experience made me appreciate more what I already have. And I don't need a relationship in order to feel validated. It also made me realise that I need to be really ready for it. For their sake and mine. I think it is really important that I am ok about who I am before I go sharing myself with others. I'm nearly there, just not quite yet.

After the break up I decided that I needed to get back on the self improvement journey. Especially because while in the relationship I gained 3.4kg (7.5lb). I pretty much spent the most of this year eating what I wanted whenever I wanted, although in smaller portions. I have since then got back on the diet bandwagon at joined the Michelle Bridge's 12 Week Body Transformation. The program is amazing... if you stick to it!

Last week I got down to my lowest weight in over four years - 80.9kg (178lb), down from the 86.7kg I had got back up to by the end of August this year. I lost 5.8kg in six weeks. How good is that! The weight was dropping off me! In August when I realised I'd gained so much I went back to my surgeon and asked for a fill and started working the band again. The motivation Michelle provides was also excellent in keeping me in check.

Unfortunately I started the 12wbt with an ear infection and then my son came down with the same ear/throat infection and then I got I terrible cold. It was awful. One of us would get better then the other would get sick again. I lost stacks of time for uni work and for exercising. Although my eating has been great (up until the last week so) I have only managed two training sessions since the 12wbt program began. Pretty shocking.

Basically, without boring you with the details, I had a huge anxiety attack about 10 days ago and it has been downhill since then. It is just amazing how we try to make ourselves feel better by going back to the old habits like eating chocolate and lazing around watching TV even though we KNOW doing the right thing (ie eating healthily and exercising) is what really makes us feel better after a break down.

So after a bout of anxiety, bad PMT and uni stress I've had a little gain of 0.3kg (just over 1lb) and I've got to get back on track! Hence the blog writing. Sometimes it just helps to see the excuses on the screen.

Next week is week six and the halfway mark of the 12wbt and I've got to get kicking! I'm going to go back and watch Michelle's vids and get remotivated. I am only 1.2kg away from getting another star on my blog banner and 10kg from the ultimate goal - 70kg. 

Hope all is well in blogland.

V.

Finally out of plateauville and into a whole new world all together!

Finally, the weight is moving again. Off that is. Off my bum, my legs, my tum, my face, my boobs... check out the pics below. The photos on the left were taken on the day of my surgery and the ones on the right were taken on the 11th of this month when I got just below 85kg which is half way to goal.

So much has been happening that my mind is in a whirlwind of excitement and emotion. Along with losing weight I've met someone! Can you believe it! Without giving too much away as it is still early days (date 5 I think, but endless hours on the phone and text), I am having the best time. He is lovely and caring and intelligent and funny and loves kids and handsome and thinks I am the bomb! I don't think I've ever been with someone who seems to be into me so completely.

My band is working as it should, I think. I can eat pretty much anything but in small portions. I am grateful for this as I've been going out for dinner more in the last few weeks than I have in years. As long as I'm slow and relaxed and chew a lot I am ok. I think I've had two teeny fills since I last blogged. My band is so sensitive that is all I need. 

As of today's weigh in I am 83.7kg or 184lb. I cannot believe I have only 4kg to go to get in the 70s. I think I might actually cry when I see a seven at the beginning of the double digit number on my scales. It is hard to believe that not that long ago I was so down in the dumps about everything and now my life is all smiles and roses. 

Uni has been very busy which is another thing that has been keeping me from blogging. I've decided to continue with this blog as I don't care who reads this now. This is my life but if there are people from my past who want to know what's going on in it, go for  it. I can't promise to blog as frequently as before as I'm so busy with everything, but will try to keep as up to date as possible. 

Hope all is well in blogland.

V.

Post promise

Hello all


I'm still trying to decide about the future of my blog but have decided that I'm not going to post until I've got to 85kg, which is the halfway mark of my weight loss journey. I can't believe it has taken me 4 months to get 85.5kg. As soon as I get this pesky 500 grams off, I'll write. Lots has been going on.

Speak soon and thank you for all your lovely messages as usual.


I'll be back.


V.